Kingdom Keys: The True Traits of a Christian Marriage


In order for man and women to sustain the unity of a marriage union, there are Kingdom Keys to keep it in the likeness of what God established by declaration for it to be.

One Flesh

One flesh means that the man and the woman must be one in all things together, intertwined, woven together, and inter-knitted together emotionally, spiritually, physically, and mentally. The fact that God the Father, Jesus the Son, and the Holy Spirit are one, but were capable of performing separate actions can help us to see how a marriage can function in unity through the study of His Word.

In the beginning God said, “Let Us”. This signifies that when He was creating the world there was a part of Him present with Him to activate His commands. The Holy Bible speaks of Jesus coming down as God in the flesh. Jesus declared in laymen terms, “As the Father goes, I go. As the Father do, I do. What the Father says, I say”. The Holy Bible also declares that Jesus left the Holy Spirit behind for believers as a Comforter. So God is functioning in the heavens and on earth uniquely as one entity.



We know that God is also the head of every marriage. God has outlined commandments for marriages that are defined in His divine inspiration. Each marriage should function under His outline to remain as one entity.

One flesh excludes all external persons, forces, things, money, material value or practically any influence. So that means that the man and the woman, should not allow external factors to divide their unity.

What often happens is one party of the marriage will allow an intruder (close or extended family member, close friends, or any other factor) to influence them maybe because of past relationships or current relationships they must consider them first besides the one they have formed a perfect union together with. One of the parties may even listen because of the social threat of possibly losing the factors that is destroying their unity in marriage. Don’t forget, by all means when you stood at the altar together and said I do, no other persons said I do, but you two. You also said it as a covenant union before God. You can not love another the same that you are to love the one you married. You can not treat the one you married the same you treat another. Even God declared in laymen terms, “you cannot love mammon or Him, you will love one or the other”. Your covenant within your marriage is the highest level of relationship you have. Anything afterwards is an external factor… possibly and intruder if it will affect your marriage negatively.

Quote: “The intruder is good at instigating conflict in marriages.” Donna Ghanney

The intruder is often beguiling, so in most cases, you can not see him or her. It is a deliberate camouflage of the enemy’s agents. It is difficult to see the enemy when he or she is busily smiling and making you feel welcomed and good all the time. The enemy will feed, dress, clothe you, and give you almost anything you would like to have, in order to intrude on your marriage and have your soul. The enemy penetrates the soul of man or women where the senses are in a reclining position. Watch and pray! If it looks too good, smells to good, feels too good, sound to good, taste too good… it may not be good for you. Step back and rethink about where you are going and where you are coming from. It was a quality trait of Jesus to know where He was going and where He was coming from.

As Christians, if we love God, then we will honor the covenant of the marriage first, and then the threat second. If the intruders truly are what they were supposed to be, they will continue to be so in consideration of your marriage. Stand firm with your decision to recognize the worth of your marriage.



If two are walking together, one is not walking behind and the other following.This will cause you to be unbalanced in your marriage. Remember unity in one flesh is paramount to you have a dynamic marital relationship.

The enemy would love to separate your Christian marital foundation in unity, because your oneness with someone in love always hits to the heart of the matter if it is broken. He will use every avenue, angle, and agent to intrude on your oneness. Marriage unity is a powerful weapon, when joined in with the Word of God and coupled with His covenant for your lives.

This is why it is important to communicate regularly, share with each other, dine together, pray together, study together, spend quality and intimate time together, and rest together. If one side of the body is weak, the other side in most cases will be strong. If the toe is aching, the hand should want to sooth it, mend it, and make it well again. When there is a battlefield of the mind, the heart will kick in to discern the problem and God will grant each of you, and both of you with the solution.

Different Paths But Still One

If you were to tie your arms together and spend the whole day walking around you will find that it is not an easy task. There is a need to function in task and activities separately, but your spiritual union should remain firm and fit.

Praying and studying the Holy Bible together and separately will help both of you to have sound wisdom, knowledge, and understanding you will need to remain empowered, and in peace together against the works of the enemy.

You may go your separate ways to work, but you should keep each other in mind, spirit, and soul through out the day. You will love each other as you love Christ. We love Christ with our body, soul, and spirit.

Team Work

Teams are given roles and responsibilities. Each team player receives task, activities, or events to accomplish at a given time and based on specific details, like budgets.

Marriage couples should also function as a team. Each member has to play a role in order for each project to be completed as you have defined the outcomes together. If one is a slacker, it will hold up the outcome of a specific project, the quality expectations may suffer, and at times it can be costly. However the good thing is you are a team. So when one is not running the race so swiftly, tenderly and softly whisper a reminder, if there is a problem then the other may have to pick up the task and run with the torch to the finish line.

It is important to know that each person should pay their particular role to the best of their abilities so that you can finish the race, and be victorious overcomers together in each project both of you defined together. Be patient with each other and allow for circumstances. You still are breathing, so you have time to re-define your original approach. and to put things back into its proper perspective.

Godly Counsel

The Holy Bible tells us not to seek or walk after the counsel of the ungodly. It is a strange thing now that children of the Most High God are seeking advice from any source that says they have something to say about marriages. As Christians, we should seek counsel from those who are called out by God to align us with His will for our lives based on the Holy Bible.

Counsel is not being informed on what you want to hear, but is rather associated with what the Word of God says for you to sustain your marriage. It is not some psychic suggesting your marriages future. It is not someone reading the palms of your hands and giving you direction. If someone is telling you to throw away your ring and they call themselves a child of God, seriously think about it if it does not align to the Holy Bible.

If you prefer to see a Psychologist, there are many that are Christian based that will give you the proper foundation of counsel to survive the unification of your marriage in the Lord.

Remember, always we all fall short of the Glory of God. If you have made mistakes in your past with your marriage, you are still breathing, this means there is opportunity for change. If you have already divorced. There is opportunity to be in unity again. Don’t allow pride to hinder your opportunity. Stop the enemy now. Find the true Kingdom of God traits of your marriage and build a sure foundation with Jesus as the Cornerstone. It will and can last forever.

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